Feeling Demoralised…

This was written last night after the concert, when I was on a train desperately trying to get home. This is real. I have spoken to the train access service today and they have been helpful, and I am awaiting to speak to the theatre. I was going to wait to publish this post but I feel so demoralised that I want to share it with you all now. I will update the post if anything changes… we must stick together and speak for the rights of those who are not heard.

My husband and I have always loved One Republic – it reminds me of such happy times when I first met him and we would sing along to ‘I lived’. That song spoke to me so much because it spoke my ethos. To live my life to the fullest despite the limitations that come with severe disabilities.

We saved up for tickets to go to see One Republic at the London Palladium I knew it would be incredibly difficult for me to do but I have always had such a love for music that I wanted to give it a go.

For months I had been building up some energy to go to this concert, to see my favourite band and have a moment where the agony I face every hour of everyday could be at the back of mind for once. I was so excited to be going.

I literally put everything into getting to this concert. Sadly, it was a catastrophe from the start. We got to the train station who informed us that there was no way of getting off the train on our way back. I get anxious being on a train when it is not certain that I can actually get off.

We then got to the London Palladium and I was so excited to see One Republic. The stress that the journey had been melted away with the thought of being able to listen to my favourite tunes.

But it was awful. Don’t get me wrong, Ryan Tedder and One Republic were singing all my favourite tunes BUT the way we were treated by The London Palladium was a real disappointment.

We were not shown to our seats, but we were given a direction and had to find a wheelchair seat. Once we got there and settled, it looked like it would be a good position… that was until the band came on and everybody stood up. I couldn’t see a thing. People were looming over me and there was nowhere I could go. I tried to move into the aisle but it made no difference, I couldn’t see a thing. People stood on their chairs, they were waving their arms as they got lost in the moment… whilst me and three other wheelchair users were stuck, unable to see or unable to enjoy it at all.

My husband, Samuel, went to find the supervisor to explain the situation and get some kind of help so we could enjoy the show… the supervisor came and said that he would come back to see if he could find a solution. An hour and a half went by and he still had not returned. It took me to give up and leave early, before the supervisor happened to see us leaving…

You know it is really hard being disabled. It is really hard to not be able to move as I want to or to stand up when I want to enjoy my favourite song. I left the venue feeling terrible, completely demoralised by the fact that I was treated as less than an able bodied person.

In a world that is so divided at the moment, I just want to ask you all to unite with disabled people. Please remember us. Disabled people want to enjoy life just as much as anyone else. How much longer do we have to be treated completely differently? I don’t want to be treated as someone special, I just want to be treated equally. And to One Republic and Ryan Tedder – you have a lot of disabled fans who really love your music, the four who were stuck in a corner and unable to see you, were all super fans of yours. We would love you to perform in an accessible venue where we are treated as human beings.

It may seem trivial that I am getting upset about a concert… but to me it symbolises much much more than that… it is how we are viewed in society…. we were just a couple – where one of us happened to be wheelchair bound – who were excited about having a date night that reminded us of the moment we first met, as Ryan Tedder sang the track ‘I lived’… When I watched that music video years ago my perspective changed of what was possible for someone like me, it gave me hope that one day I would be able to go to one of their concerts having been bed bound for over half my life, because I was going to live. .

I’m tired of the constant fight. I’m tired of having to be different. I’m tired of having to become really ill for daring to go out to something that turned out to not even be worth my precious energy.

I’m tired because I have to fight not only my body but people’s thoughtless actions, when all I want to say is ‘I lived’

Please share this, the more voices that hear us, the more likely it will be that people listen.

This was written last night after the concert, when I was on a train desperately trying to get home. This is real. I have spoken to the train access service today and they have been helpful, and I am awaiting to speak to the theatre. I was going to wait to publish this post but I feel so demoralised that I want to share it with you all now. I will update the post if anything changes… we must stick together and speak for the rights of those who are not heard.